Here we are, September again…time for school, and the return to regularly scheduled programming…with a twist. The Covid 19 Pandemic has changed the way parents are doing custody because it has already changed the way children are attending school and every other aspect of childhood as we know it. From learning math to attending playdates, parents must adjust how the arrangements that were previously made that worked, for possibly years, will work in the current times.
Most schools are operating remotely at least part-time across the country. This means kids are going to have to stay with someone when they are not in school. Former spouses are being forced to re-evaluate their work schedules and arrangements. Many businesses have moved towards a work-from-home model to keep their employees safe from infection, and this can work to the benefit of those with kids.
As with all custody adjustments, this will require cool heads and communication. Even though the school year has already begun, the process of educating children is still fluid throughout the country as infection rates fluctuate. The sooner you set up a virtual teleconference between all concerned parties, namely ex-spouses, and children old enough to contribute, the sooner a schedule can be hashed out to everyone’s satisfaction.
Obviously, the hope is that both parents are still working during this time when many Americans have lost their jobs. If one parent is between jobs, it may seem easier to have that parent in charge of the remote learning aspect of childcare, while the other takes the kids at other times. It can really help if you consider yourselves as part of a team in this unprecedented time in history. In fact, many formerly married couples have learned to put aside previous animosities in the face of this new reality. Issues that may have caused explosive arguments just last year may seem petty and unimportant when compared with the real-life struggles many across the world are being faced with. Although marriage has ended, you must still operate as some sort of family, working together to make sure that you all remain healthy and productive.
Parents responsible for supervising remote learning do not have it easy. Most programs demand some sort of direction on the part of the parent, a prospect that can be overwhelming if that parent is also getting paid to perform their jobs from home. Children are easily distracted and need to be reminded to stay on task, which makes concentrating on your own work extra challenging. The parent that signs up for that must be prepared to have patience.
Also to consider is whether a parent that works outside the home may work in an environment that exposes them to huge masses of people possibly infected with COVID, such as in healthcare or mass transit. Not everyone is able to work from home, and the greater the chance of being exposed, the more all parties may want to consider adjusting custody to minimize exposure for the children.
Everything has changed since the pandemic hit, not the least of which is how we have to parent while trying our hardest to keep the ones we love safe. Hopefully, we can all agree to do what is best for the children, despite past arguments, or how this new reality may inconvenience us.
1530 The Alameda, Suite 108
San Jose, CA 95126
TDC Family Law serves the entire state of California for Family Law Contempt of Court & Private Settlement Judge, Parent Coordinator & Mediation